How to Relax Your Nervous System: Quick and Easy Techniques
Having effective methods to calm your nervous system quickly are helpful to keep in your back pocket. Most of us have been there before – you are going about your business and then, BAM! Out of nowhere, it feels like a switch has been flipped and your nervous system is absolutely revving up. You feel agitated, fidgety, anxious, and feel like you can’t calm your nervous system no matter how many mantras you pull out of your pocket.
The Sympathetic Nervous System: Fight or Flight Response
When we get anxious like this and need to reduce anxiety quickly, we are in our sympathetic nervous system; the part of the system that is responding to threat. Because of the way our modern American lives are structured, a lot of us feel like we are under threat but can’t quite identify what is coming after us or how to “conquer the beast” so to speak. You may be in fight, flight, or freeze mode.
That’s why sometimes, no matter how much you try to talk yourself down or convince yourself that the threat isn’t real and you’re just making a big deal out of all of it, it doesn’t work. The issue isn’t cognitive, but biological. To understand more about nervous system dysregulation, click here.
If you’re wanting to learn some helpful techniques to calm your nervous system (fancy words for chilling out), this post is for you.
What are Effective Techniques to Relax my Nervous System?
Effective techniques to calm your nervous system include box breathing, orienting, grounding yourself, making a deep “voo” sound, and using cold therapy. In this blog post, we’ll explore each one, with simple tips on how to quickly use these techniques to calm your nervous system.
Box Breathing: A Simple Technique to Reduce Stress
Box breathing is a simple technique for nervous system regulation. Use box breathing to quickly calm your nervous system when you are in fight or flight mode.
I know, breath work is all the rage right now. While I am certainly not an expert in that area, I do know that box breathing can really help people calm their nervous system. Actually, a very specific method of box breathing is the most helpful for when you are in fight or flight mode.
When we get anxious, our brain sends signals to the body telling it to get ready for action, which means that energy needs to be sent to very specific places in the body. The breath rate increases to help get more oxygen to the muscles. Sometimes, if we can get the breath rate to return to normal, we can help send signals back to the brain to reduce anxiety and calm the nervous system quickly.
I like to use this specific method to calm the nervous system when people feel like they are breathing too shallow and can’t get a satisfying breath, and by proxy, wind up lowering the carbon dioxide in the blood which causes symptoms of hyperventilation.
How Do I Do Box Breathing?
Take a deep breath in (can count to four just like when you box breathe if it is helpful)
Hold the breath for four seconds
Release the breath, really pushing it out until you feel like you have released all of the air that you possibly can that is in your lungs
Keep your lungs deflated until you get the natural urge to breathe again
If you’re wondering how to calm the nervous system quickly and naturally, this exercise helps to reset the natural way of breathing and get out of the shallow breath cycle. Once you feel anxiety relief, try to bring your awareness to something pleasant to get out of the cycle of being hyper aware of your breath.
Quick Tip:
This exercise isn’t for everyone. For some people, trying to auto-regulate or override the breath can be more triggering than it is helpful. If this is you, not to fear! There are plenty of other things you can try.
Deep “Voo” Sound: Vibrate Your Vagus Nerve for Instant Calm
Using a deep “voo” sound to stimulate your vagus nerve can be a quick and easy way to calm your nervous system. You can use the deep “voo” technique by yourself or with a friend.
I know, this method to quickly calm the nervous system sounds weird, but all of my clients love it. The deep “voo” is a trick I pull out of my hat especially at the end of difficult sessions when my client is having any challenges calming their nervous system. The deep “voo” sound was created by Dr. Peter Levine, Somatic Experiencing’s creator. By making a deep “voo” you are actually vibrating the vagus nerve, which plays a crucial role in the sympathetic nervous system. The sympathetic nervous system puts on the “brakes,” or helps to calm down the nervous system. In layman’s terms, it helps us to relax after being overwhelmed.
How Do I Do a Deep “Voo Sound?
Get in a comfortable position with your feet on the ground
Take a good breath in, hold for a second
Breathe out and make the “voo” sound. It should sound like an “om” in yoga. Here’s an example.
Repeat until you feel a bit more calm. It should be about 4-5 rounds
Quick Tip:
Grab a buddy! “Vooing” with others helps to get good safety input into the nervous system. When others feel safe, we feel safe. If you enjoy doing this in groups, try Aum/Om chanting in meditation circles or after yoga. This is an ancient practice that has been helpful in many ways, to many people, for ages.
Ground Yourself: Feeling Your Legs to Reduce Panic
In a moment of panic, find your legs! Becoming aware of your legs can help quickly bring you back to reality and calm your nervous system.
When we are panicking, we often have intense “flight” energy. The “get me out of here” feeling. (Learn more about fight, flight, and freeze here.) Some of my clients have described it to me as wanting to “crawl out of their skin” in the past. Just so uncomfortable you almost can’t stand it.
Flight energy often times lives in our legs. When we are panicked we often forget that we have legs – it sounds funny, but if I had a dollar for the amount of times I asked somebody who was feeling panicked if they were aware of or could feel their legs in a session and they said “no,” I’d have a lot of dollars! This quick technique to relax your nervous system can help you become more aware of your body.
How Do I Ground Myself?
Sit in any place and put your feet on the ground. If you’re standing up, make sure your legs aren’t stiff and your feet are underneath your hips.
Bring your awareness to your legs. What can you feel? Can you feel your weight in your feet?
Try alternating pressing your feet into the ground.
If that isn’t satisfying, try flexing your leg muscles as well
For extra proprioceptive input, try lifting onto your tippy toes, then drop down quickly onto your heels. This can feel really nice
See if you can notice a release of some of that intense energy
I like this method of calming the nervous system because it gives the fight/flight energy somewhere to go and something to do. It is also super accessible - I have done this myself when experiencing turbulence during a flight and found it to be highly effective.
Quick Tip:
If you’re in a pinch, you can always google things like “quick ways to ground yourself” and you will find plenty of resources online, and fast. One thing to note about trying to calm your nervous system when you are already feeling panicky is that the rational part of your brain that makes decisions and problem solves is not as active (the prefrontal cortex). This can make it hard to remember to do new coping skills in the moment or even remember what they are. This is why I guide some of my clients to look nervous system regulation skills up if they can’t remember, and even try to write them down somewhere they can easily access for the future.
Orienting: Tune Into Your Surroundings for Calmness
Orienting yourself is similar to being a deer in the woods. A deer will often pause what they are doing to check in with their surroundings and make sure they are safe. To quickly calm your nervous system, bring awareness to your surroundings and take notice of little things.
Orienting, or as I like to call this exercise “being a deer in the woods”, is an another effective technique to quickly calm your nervous system. If you watch deer for any length of time as they causally graze, you will notice that they will often pause from snacking and pick their heads up and look around with their head, neck, and eyes. They are making sure they are safe, and then they go back to eating. This is what I’m proposing you give a go (grass-eating is at your own discretion, obviously).
When we intentionally bring our awareness to our surroundings, it sends signals to our brain that we are scanning for threats and not finding anything, calming our nervous system. It can also help calm any unhelpful mental chatter.
How Do I Orient Myself?
Move your head, neck, chest and eyes slowly around the room
See if you can find anything of note, maybe something that is interesting to you
For extra calming, try moving your jaw in a relaxed way. Open and shut it slowly, or move it side to side
Keep looking up, down, and all around until you start to feel a bit calmer.
Be sure to follow any natural impulse that might come up, such as getting up and walking around, or getting a drink of water
Quick Tip:
Here’s a helpful tip on orienting yourself: try to find something new in the space you’re in that you haven’t noticed before, or try to notice new details. You would be shocked at the amount of times I have had a long-term client in my office and when I have them orient to my office in a new way, they notice something new!
Cool Down: Using Cold Therapy to Calm Your Nervous System
Cold therapy is an effective way to calm your nervous system. Try taking a cold shower or putting an ice pack on your neck or chest.
Getting the vagus nerve to cool down is another way to calm your nervous system.
How Can I Use Cold Therapy To Calm My Nervous System?
Putting your face in an ice bath
Putting an ice back on your neck or upper chest
Cold shower
I personally like to utilize the ice pack method for nervous system relaxation because it is more accessible in the moment. You can even use an ice cube or a cold water bottle in a pinch.
Quick Tip:
If you’re finding yourself being too “on” when you are trying to go to sleep, get a cold neck wrap to stimulate that vagus nerve. Chill out (literally) to help yourself fall asleep.
Still Needing Help? Get a Partner or Friend Involved.
We are not meant to live on an island by ourselves, and therefore we heal better when we aren’t alone. There are so many studies on why it is important to have regular, purposeful interactions with other people and how it contributes to overall mental health and longevity.
It can be very helpful to have another person’s support when your nervous system is being a little bit more stubborn. Especially when that other person is calm, they can help send signals to your nervous system that there is nothing to worry about. We have these things called “mirroring neurons” which help send signals of either safety or danger to other people, and sometimes these mirroring neurons can be very calming for somebody in a high sympathetic state.
How Can I Relax My Nervous System With A Partner?
You and your partner might have to try out different ways to find calm, but here are some ideas:
Ask them to speak to you about a funny memory
Talk with them about something mundane, like plans for the rest of your day
Have them get you something comforting, like a favorite blanket or cup of tea (decaf, please!)
Try soothing touch
Have them sit next to you and breathe deeply
Try om chanting together
When Should I Seek Professional Help to Relax My Nervous System?
While little tricks like this can certainly help people calm their nervous systems, I want to be very clear about one thing: this is not trauma healing.
Certainly feeling safe in the body is a large component of doing trauma work. However, this is not resolving anything because it is not addressing the root cause of why nervous system dysregulation is happening in the first place.
In order to do that work, it is best to find a somatic therapist experienced in treating trauma. Somatic Experiencing is an amazing modality to use in order to utilize the body to heal trauma, not just cope with an overwhelmed nervous system.
Explore Nervous System Healing with Embodied Healing KC
If you’re looking to not just manage your stress but truly understand and heal your nervous system, working with a skilled therapist can make a world of difference. At Embodied Healing KC, we specialize in somatic therapy to help you reconnect with your body, process trauma, and cultivate lasting calm. Whether you’re dealing with chronic anxiety, trauma responses, or just want to feel more grounded, we are here to support you.
Frequently Asked Questions About Calming Your Nervous System
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One of the quickest ways to calm your nervous system is through box breathing. This technique helps regulate your breath, sending signals to your brain that you’re safe. Breathe in for four seconds, hold for four seconds, exhale for four seconds, and hold again for four seconds. Repeat until you feel calmer.
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The Deep Voo sound stimulates the vagus nerve, which is a key player in activating the parasympathetic nervous system—the body’s relaxation response. Making a deep “voo” sound during exhalation sends calming vibrations through your body, signaling it to down-regulate.
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When anxiety kicks in, your sympathetic nervous system triggers a fight-or-flight response, releasing adrenaline and making you feel agitated. This can cause shallow breathing, increased heart rate, and a desire to escape. Techniques like grounding and orienting help redirect that energy.
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A simple grounding technique is to feel your legs and feet. Sit with your feet on the ground, press them down, and notice the sensations in your legs. You can also try lifting your heels and dropping them quickly for added proprioceptive input, helping release anxious energy.
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Orienting involves moving your head, neck, and eyes slowly around your environment, like a deer scanning the area for safety. This practice helps reassure your brain that there’s no immediate threat, allowing your nervous system to relax.
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Yes, cold therapy like placing an ice pack on your neck or upper chest can stimulate the vagus nerve, promoting the body’s calm-down response. Using cold water or ice can be especially helpful when you’re feeling overly alert or anxious.
Stevie Spiegel is a Licensed Therapist and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner located in Kansas City. She uses Somatic Experiencing as her main body-based trauma healing modality, as well as EMDR. As an Intuitive Eating Counselor, she uses these principles to help her clients challenge their relationship with their cultural misconceptions about their body and food.
